LONDON.
Iris Tontine, 29, committed to three years imprisonment for the illegal detainment and prolonged sexual assault on Elder Abner Millhausen, 18, an American Mormon missionary, said she would appeal the severity of the sentence.
Iris liked her Sunday mornings. Her manservant, Iris also liked men to serve her, would bring to her bed a breakfast consisting of Earl Grey tea and scrambled eggs on sourdough toast, topped with Beluga caviar, whose salty, black balls she crunched between her teeth as she read the Sunday Times. After that, she would go to her desk. There, sipping on a half bottle of Veuve Cliquot Champagne, she would apply herself to the accounting books of the three hotels she owned around the London area.
From somewhere below, the doorbell rang. Iris ignored it. The bell rang again and Iris waited for someone to answer. It rang again and again, until she remembered that she had given the servant the rest of morning off. Wrapping a gown around her nakedness, Iris grumbled as she answered the door herself.
The two boys were beautiful. The tags on their short sleeved shirts read Elder Abner and Elder Michael. Their hair was blond, cropped short. They smiled at her with shining wall to wall teeth as they introduced themselves and could not believe their luck when Iris invited them in.
"She sat us down on a couch and seemed very interested in what we had to say." Elder Michael.
"You must be thirsty after all that talking," Iris said. "You must take tea."
Elder Abner held up his hand against the cup Iris handed to him. "Mormons don’t drink tea," he said.
"Coffee?"
"No."
"Gin?"
"No thank you," Elder Abner said. "Mormons don’t take stimulants of any kind."
"Oh," Iris said. And as she withdrew the cup stumbled, spilling the tea in Elder Abner’s lap.
"Luckily the tea wasn’t hot, but it soaked the front of my trousers." Elder Abner.
"Oh, silly me," Iris said. "Let me get you out of those wet things," and reached for his belt buckle.
"No, please," Elder Abner stayed her hand.
"Silly," Iris said. "You’ll catch you death of cold," and began dabbing at his thighs with a napkin.
"No, really," Elder Abner said."It’s nothing."
"That doesn’t feel like nothing," Iris said as she dabbed between his legs.
"Please," Elder Abner said. "That is inappropriate touching."
"What do you mean, inappropriate, don’t you guys fuck on first dates?"
"This is not a first date," Elder Abner said. "And Mormons don’t fuck before marriage."
"Well go and get married," Iris said. "And I’ll fuck you when you get back."
"And Mormons don’t say, fuck," Elder Michael said.
"Shameless hussy," Elder Abner said, as he plucked the wet trousers from his legs.
"Jezabel," Elder Michael said, as he led Elder Abner to the door.
When they had gone, Iris picked up the phone and dialled. "Joe," she said. "There’s a paira Mormons just leaving. They should be at the gatehouse in a coupla minutes. Follow them. Find out where they live." She pushed her fingers into the moist nest between her legs. " I want the one called Abner."
"To avoid occasions of sin, Mormon missionaries always go in pairs. However, on the morning in question, Elder Michael, who had caught a chill after an all night prayer vigil, stayed in his bed while I went alone to the market for lemons to make him a hot drink. A car, which seemed to be following me, suddenly sped up, mounted the sidewalk and blocked my passage. Three men jumped out. Two them held my arms, while the third pulled a bag over my head. They forced me inside. I heard doors slam, the engine roar, felt a sharp pain on my arm, they must have injected me with something, and knew no more." Elder Abner.
When Elder Abner awoke, he thought he had died and gone to heaven, for he seemed to be resting on a bank of soft, white clouds. Beneath him, he thought it was beneath him, a young man, he seemed to recognise was lying on a huge circular bed. The young man’s shirt was undone to the waist. His legs were wide apart, and someone, it seemed to be a woman, a naked woman, sitting astride the young man undoing his trousers. Elder Abner’s vision was so clear he could almost feel the woman’s fingers as she pulled down the young man’s zip, cup his balls with one hand and take his hugeness with the other. Elder Abner felt himself grow hard